our summer trip this year we hired a bus from
the Bensham branch of Ivan Oldrek Motors
and set out on our journey. We got almost as far as
Backworth when we had our first breakdown. The driver,
Andy Mann, thought the engine had fallen out but the
man from the RAC said it was just the gearbox.
were able to take a look round Backworth Cathedral
while the bus was being fixed. They have a lovely
cafe in the cloisters so we all had coffee and cream
cakes. Faye McAdimmy bit into
a huge chocolate eclair but the cream spurted out
and shot straight into Emma Wroid's eyes. Emma lost
control of her coffee and drenched the people on the
next table. Cannon Fadge eventually managed to break
up the fight that started and luckily only four people
needed hospital treatment. When we got back to the
bus it was all mended and we continued our journey.
we got to Cullercoats the driver could not find anywhere
to park the bus so he left it on the beach. Everyone
rushed out with their buckets and spades and started
building sandcastles. Young Chris Cross was in a playful
mood and started to cover his sister Victoria in sand.
She was up to her neck in it when the tide started
to come in. Fortunately their father George saw what
was happening and managed to pull her out just in
time. Everyone thought George Cross should get a medal.
Some people thought Victoria Cross should get a medal
the sun came out and we all removed our shoes and
socks and went for a plodge. The sea at Cullercoates
is very cold and when everyone's feet turned blue
we went for fish and chips at Phil Yertum's Chippy
on the cliff top. We were all getting stuck into our
meal when Frank Ferter looked out of the window and
saw a very funny looking boat. Everyone laughed at
the strange sight except Andy Mann the driver. "That's
not a boat" he said, "That's our bus!"
The tide had come in and the bus was completely surrounded
by the sea. Iona Bigyot shrieked "My husband,
Ivor, is asleep on the back seat!" Avery Niceman
got on his mobile and
called Mr. Aaron C Reskew at the local coast guard
station. He sent a lifeboat which arrived at the scene
promptly. They searched the bus for Ivor Bigyot but
he had mysteriously disappeared. Then the helicopter
came and searched the area but there was still no
sign of Ivor.
We had all finished our fish and chips and made our
way back to the beach while the drama was taking place.
Iona was very upset and wondered where on earth her
husband could be. Then Jacqueline Hyde saw a man walking
along the beach with an ice cream. She couldn't tell
who it was at first but as he got nearer she realised
it was Ivor Bigyot.
Jacqueline shouted at the top of her voice "Its
Iona was furious. "Where have you been, you great
wassock", she yelled.
"I've been for an ice cream", replied Ivor.
"I can see that, but how did you get off the
bus?" Iona asked.
"Oh, that was easy." said Ivor. "I
hitched a lift on a passing pedalo."
this time the tide was going out again and it wasn't
long before we could get back on the bus. Andy pressed
the starter button but nothing happened. Unfortunately,
water had got into the engine and it needed to dry
out. The man from the RAC only took an hour and a
dozen cans of WD40 to get us on our way.
were all singing "The wheels on the bus go round
and round" when we had our next breakdown. Actually
it was more of sabotage than a breakdown. We were
passing Backworth Cathedral again. The people we had
the fight with earlier had scattered tacks on the
road. Luckily just two of the tyres were punctured.
Andy Mann only had one spare wheel so he had to call
the garage in Bensham to bring another. We sang more
choruses of "The wheels on the bus" while
we waited two hours for the new wheel to arrive.
was midnight when we got going again and everyone
was feeling sleepy. The loud bang that woke us
all up was the result of our bus colliding with a
pile of rubbish. Andy Mann had also dozed off and
managed to drive into the Seghill council tip. We
all ended up covered in rotten fish and other disgusting
stuff. We got off the bus and started to pull it out
of the tip but Andy Mann thought we should just leave
it where it was as it was a load of rubbish too.
thought it was the greatest day out ever despite the
long and very smelly walk home.